Zlatan's World

Come hither my minions… Gather round and listen to me spout. Hear me roar! I am Zlatan. Here in my dojo atop a mountain thousands of miles from Earth, I watch over my flock with a tear of pride almost forming in my third eye. You are my flock, Earthlings, and I am your Zlatan. I am emperor of the universe and you are all my slaves! You are my humble servants, and I am your worshipfulness. Kings, presidents, Gods, monsters and chief executive officers are nothing compared to a single, awe-inspiring Zlatan! Zlatan is the light, the fresh water streams, the mountain air, the children's tears and the dog's bollocks.

I am Zlatan, twice as Christ! Zlatan the one! Zlatan the warrior! Zlatan the beast! Zlatan the sex beast warrior god! Zlatan, lone-wolf maverick renegade ninja warrior… temptress (?) Zlatan, defeater of light and darkness, good and evil. A Talismaniac warlock of future past. A living legacy. Truly, a Zlatan.

Look into my eyes… Drink from my sweaty pits… Read my furrowed brow. I. Am. Zlatan.

Thinker. Nomad. Wizard. Samurai. Sorcerer. Lover. Shabba.

I hope you have fun perusing my demented den. And if you feel the need to 'crack one out', use the on-site, all-digital, virtually spotless mid-range Japanese electronic crapper. This months attractive toilet fragrance is 'Heathen woman'. A fragrance both decadent and depraved.

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