Sexy Girls Of Denmark (Lu Chi, 1973)
"They are HUGE!"
Mr Fung senior sends his son, Mr Fung jr aka Kwok Chuen to Denmark to procure some tasty white chicks to entertain the companies clients. As it happens, some contract or other between Fung's company & the Danes is about to run out and needs renewing. Because of this thread-bare plot, several rival firms are all attempting to get Fung's attention by luring him into bed using a variety of sexy whites vixens. And I mean vixens in the Russ Meyer sense. All natural, like. Cue sexy Danish hysteria!
One of the companies hires sexy lady Ann-Charlotte, who is none other than sexy hot pot Birte Tove (of Bamboo House of Dolls fame). Hurrah!
Soon enough, every woman who crosses Fung's path wants to get it on with him, right sexy like. Ooooh, those ruddy Danes, they're positively incorrigible!
Fung jr soon goes on a wacky adventure littered with a bevvy of beautiful naked ladies, and ends up shacking and shagging the lovely Ann-Charlotte… and who could blame the man for that? Trouble is, Fung Senior recognises the strumpet Charlotte from a porno movie! Cue MORE sexy chaos!!
After the hour mark, however, the film runs out of sexy steam, and begins to be a dual love story, with some obligatory kung-fu fight scenes thrown in for no apparent reason. That said, it is a Shaw Brothers release, so it'd rude not to have some kung-fu chaos I suppose.
Cheeky trumpets, sexy crumpets. Romantic sax, soft-core sex, innuendo is everywhere! Add to this, badly dubbed stilted English dialogue, random disco dancing, dodgy slow-mo's, splendidly kitsch funk tunes, slapstick farcical 'comedy', and you have an entertaining romp in the style of bawdy English films like the Carry On saga. Don't get me wrong, Sexy Girls Of Denmark is bad, but it's also an enjoyable romp. Excellent use of cock-shaped candles.
